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URL: http://riceornot.ricecop.com/?auto=36079
Submitted by: DiRF
Comments: 156  (Read/Post)     Favorites: 2  (View)
Submitted on: 10-12-2004
View Stats Category: Off-topic
Post your favorite movie quotes, monologues, dialogues, etc... in this thread.


Showing page: 6 of 8
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7-09-2006 @ 08:30:56 PM
Posted By : solid_snake Reply | Edit | Del
#97, Maggie Jacobs: [trying to persuade Andy to ask Ross Kemp for a line] Just talk to him. Tell him you loved him in Eastenders, Spandau Ballet...
Andy Millman: He wasn't in Spandau Ballet. You're thinking of Martin Kemp.
Maggie Jacobs: Aren't they brothers?
Andy Millman: In Spandau Ballet it's Martin and Gary Kemp.
Maggie Jacobs: So who's this one?
Andy Millman: Ross Kemp.
Maggie Jacobs: Who's his brother?
Andy Millman: I... I don't know if he's got a brother.
Maggie Jacobs: Yes, he has, he has. The bald one, looks just like him, works in the Queen Vic.
Andy Millman: Phil Mitchell?
Maggie Jacobs: Yes.
Andy Millman: Well, they're brothers on the show but they're not brothers in real life.
Maggie Jacobs: Yes, they are! They're the Mitchell brothers.
Andy Millman: [getting exasperated] What do you mean the Mitchell brothers? You know his name's Ross Kemp!
[Maggie is still looking very puzzled]
Andy Millman: What bit's confusing you?
Maggie Jacobs: [after a pause. mumbles] They're brothers.
Andy Millman: "They're brothers".
[an extra walks by wearing a futuristic sci-fi costume]
Andy Millman: Is that confusing you too? Do you think we've landed in the future?
Maggie Jacobs: Shut your face!

7-26-2006 @ 12:28:25 AM
Posted By : DiRF  Reply | Edit | Del
City of Angels

"Why'd you do it?"
*opens up his wallet* "My daughter, Ruth... her stupid husband, Frank... and my grandkids, Petie, Hannah... and this is my wife, Teresa..."

7-26-2006 @ 05:40:38 AM
Posted By : Sensekhmet Reply | Edit | Del
Dog Soldiers

Where's Spoon?!
There is no Spoon.


The whole movie was simply hilarious. Funny dialogue coupled to brit/scottish accents made me laugh my ass off.

[Edited by Sensekhmet on 7-26-2006 @ 05:41:46 AM]

8-02-2006 @ 03:09:49 AM
Posted By : Sensekhmet Reply | Edit | Del
Inside Man:
My name is Dalton Russell, pay strict attention to what I say because I choose my words carefully and never repeat myself. I told you my name, that's the Who. The Where can most readily be described as a prison cell. But there is a vast difference from being stuck in a tiny cell and being in prison. The What is easy, recently I planned and set in motion events to execute the perfect bank robbery, that's also the When. As for the Why, beyond the obvious financial motivation, it's exceedingly simple... because I can. Which leaves us only with the How, and therein, as the bard tells us, lies the rub.

8-20-2006 @ 05:22:24 PM
Posted By : Skid Reply | Edit | Del
A classic moment from Evil Dead 2:

Demon Henrietta: "I'll swallow your soul! I'll swallow your soul! I'll swall -"
*Voice cut off as Ash stomps on her throat and levels his shotgun to her face.*
Ash: "Swallow this."

[Edited by Skid on 8-20-2006 @ 05:23:35 PM]

9-03-2006 @ 01:19:26 AM
Posted By : DiRF  Reply | Edit | Del
Waking Ned Devine

Michael O'Sullivan was my great friend. But I don't ever remember telling him that. The words that are spoken at a funeral are spoken too late for the man who is dead. What a wonderful thing it would be to visit your own funeral. To sit at the front and hear what was said, maybe say a few things yourself. Michael and I grew old together. But at times, when we laughed, we grew young. If he was here now, if he could hear what I say, I'd congratulate him on being a great man, and thank him for being a friend.

10-13-2006 @ 02:45:11 AM
Posted By : Skid Reply | Edit | Del
Bubba Ho-Tep:

*While translating hieroglyphic graffiti in the bathroom*
JFK: Now this top line translates into, "Pharoah gobbles donkey goobers," and the bottom line, "Cleopatra does the nasty."
Elvis: Say what?
JFK: Well pretty much, that's the best I can translate it.

10-13-2006 @ 09:15:39 AM
Posted By : Low-Tech Redneck Reply | Edit | Del
Crap, someone already did this one

[Edited by Low-Tech Redneck on 10-13-2006 @ 09:17:46 AM]

11-16-2006 @ 10:45:37 PM
Posted By : DiRF  Reply | Edit | Del
South Park

Then one time I believe it was July
August... there's a knock on the door. I open it, and there's this cute little girl scout...
Oh she was so adorable with the little pigtails and all...
...and she says to me, "How would you like to buy some cookies?"
And I said, "Well, what kind do you have?"
She had Thinmints, Graham Chrunchy things...
...raisin oatmeal...
Raisin oatmeal... and I said, "We'll take a Graham Crunch, how much will that be?"
And she looks at me and she says, "I need about tree fiddy."
Tree Fiddy.
Well it was about that time that I noticed that this girl scout was about eight stories tall and was a crustacean from the Paleozoic era...
The Loch Ness Monster.
I said, "DAMMIT MONSTER get off my lawn! I ain't givin' you no tree fiddy!"

11-16-2006 @ 10:45:46 PM
Posted By : DiRF  Reply | Edit | Del
...he said, "How about just two fiddy?"
I said, "Oh now it's only two fiddy, what is there a sale on Loch Ness munchies or something?"
Lord he was angry.
Damn right I was angry!
Not you, the monster, he was about to kick your ass.
Hey shut yo mouth, woman!

11-16-2006 @ 11:10:04 PM
Posted By : wannabemustangjockey Reply | Edit | Del
Raul Julia: The first rule of Italian driving: What is behind-a me ... (snaps off rearview mirror) ... is-a not important!" (throws it out of the car)

God, how I love the Gumball Rally.

12-22-2006 @ 12:15:41 PM
Posted By : DiRF  Reply | Edit | Del

*actors are reading lines off of a teleprompter*

Dr. Randall, what a surprise! Are you having lunch here?
I will if it's that sample. Huh... I wish it was that simple.
[offstage] This guy never heard of contact lenses?
The test results have come back.
And I'm afraid the results are very disturbing. It seems that Angelique has a rare case of brake fluid...
Bran... fluid. Bran flavor.

[offstage] What the hell?
Brain fever!
Say it!

Brain fever!
Yes. Brain fever. Or what we call in Austria...
[they both goggle at the word]
Kopfgeschlagen. At the current rate of inflation, her brain will laterally explore the...
Literally explode?
Exactly, within the next three houses.
Yes, will literally explode within next three hours. I would suggest leaving the restraint.
Restaurant, yes.
Her brain will actually explode?
Yes, yes, I've, um, seen it happen. It's a dreadful, dreadful thug. Thing.

12-22-2006 @ 12:17:33 PM
Posted By : thirtyseven Reply | Edit | Del
"OI!!! Keep your hands out of my SOUP!!!"

Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, a movie full of much clever dialogue, all of which I have forgotten... hence the quote I posted.

12-22-2006 @ 02:00:31 PM
Posted By : Muntz05 Reply | Edit | Del
#109, thats my favorite SP episode

12-22-2006 @ 02:14:45 PM
Posted By : DiRF  Reply | Edit | Del
#114, http://youtube.com/watch?v=Ebs873SWiWY

3-25-2007 @ 12:46:58 AM
Posted By : Skid Reply | Edit | Del
Red vs. Blue

Doc: I joined the Army as a conscientious objector....I'm a pacifist.
Caboose: You're a thing babies suck on?
Tucker: No, that's a pedophile.

3-25-2007 @ 12:49:52 AM
Posted By : Subourbon187 Reply | Edit | Del
"Homer, did you stay up all night eating cheese?"

"I think I'm blind!"

8-14-2007 @ 08:13:54 PM
Posted By : DiRF  Reply | Edit | Del
Meet Joe Black

"Should I be afraid?"
"Not a man like you."

11-28-2007 @ 07:00:56 PM
Posted By : Skid Reply | Edit | Del
#113, "And another thing....they'll be armed."
"Armed? With what?"
"Uh....bad breath. Feather dusters. What do you think? Guns, you tit!"
"Guns? You didn't say nothin' 'bout no guns. This has gone from 'the easiest job in the fucking world' to 'we might lose our fucking lives'!"

1-30-2008 @ 06:46:18 AM
Posted By : Sensekhmet Reply | Edit | Del
"Aww, you motherfuckers. Okay. Alright. I'm putting cases on all you bitches. Huh. You think you can do this shit... Jake. You think you can do this to me? You motherfuckers will be playing basketball in Pelican Bay when I get finished with you. SHU program, nigga. 23 hour lockdown. I'm the man up in this piece. You'll never see the light of... who the fuck do you think you're fucking with? I'm the police, I run shit around here. You just live here. Yeah, that's right, you better walk away. Go on and walk away... 'cause I'm gonna' burn this motherfucker down. King Kong ain't got shit on me. That's right, that's right. Shit, I don't, fuck. I'm winning anyway, I'm winning... I'm winning any motherfucking way. I can't lose. Yeah, you can shoot me, but you can't kill me. "

Training Day

Showing page: 6 of 8
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